I’m writing this from Queenstown, New Zealand. We’re towards the end of a family trip, and after we get home, our home and family life will change quite a lot.

I’ve stolen forty minutes before someone needs something from me, which feels like an appropriate way to start something that is fundamentally about carving out space for myself.

Tomorrow I turn 49.

Which means in exactly 52 weeks I turn 50.

Take out two weeks over Christmas because I’m a real person, not a machine, and that leaves exactly 50 weeks for this personal project. I did not plan that symmetry.

I’ve spent the last 18 months choosing myself — my health, my mind, my wellbeing.

Over the next 50 weeks, I’m going to keep going, and I’m taking you with me if you want to come.

I deep dive. It’s just how my brain works. When something grabs me, I go seventeen tabs deep and surface three days later with opinions and a lot of saved PDFs. Perimenopause grabbed me about three years ago, and I haven’t stopped since. Neither has menopause, motherhood at this stage, aging parents, body recomposition, identity, or the general experience of being a woman in her late 40s trying to figure out what the second half of her life will look like.

This isn’t 75 Hard.

It’s not a challenge, a program, or another thing to add to an already full plate. At this stage of life, who needs more of that? It’s more of an awareness. A refinement. Intention setting for how I want the next half of my life to look, taking the time to actually work it out, out loud, with you.

I’m not entirely sure what it’s going to look like. But I have some ideas.

Here’s what the year looks like.

Body. Four DEXA scans, an exercise physiologist, GLP-1, and working towards some unreal fitness goals. The data is real, the progress is real, and the setbacks will be too.

Brain. Perimenopause does things to your brain that nobody warns you about. Bone density, sleep, hormones beyond estrogen, HRT(MHT), the symptoms that never get named in polite company. I’ve gone very deep on all of it, and I’ll keep sharing what I find.

Self. Who I thought I’d be at this age versus who I actually am. Style, identity, reinvention, and strangely, at this point in my life, career. The things I’ve stopped doing and the things I’m finally starting.

Family. Raising teenagers while your parents are aging is a lot on top of everything else. The invisible labour of being the person who holds everything together while also trying to hold yourself together.

Mindset. The gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it.

Creative. So much I’ve been putting off, and other things completed but not yet out in the world. What it means to make things in your late 40s and give yourself permission to share them. If I dare.

If you’ve been here a while, thank you. If you’re new, start with the archives. There’s a lot in there.

Either way, I’m glad you’re here.

See you next week.

Robyn x

PS In January on Facebook I asked

Here’s what some had to say

I’d love to know your answer to this!

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